Go, Then

Ben didn’t leave that night. He was angry with me, and he had every right to be, but Edith needed him, and Ben does what Edith needs. He sat down again and picked up the pen. He didn’t look at me.

那天晚上 Ben 没有走。他在生我的气,他有道理,可是 Edith 需要他,而 Ben 总是做 Edith 需要的事。他又坐了下来,拿起了笔。他没有看我。

“Amara,” said Edith. “We must answer Amara first. I still don’t know what to say.”

“Amara,”Edith 说。”我们得先回 Amara 的信。我还是不知道该说什么。”

I stood up. “Give me an hour,” I said.

我站了起来。”给我一个小时,”我说。

I ran across the square to the shop. My father was behind the counter, doing the crossword in the evening paper, with his glasses on his nose. The shop was empty.

我跑过广场,到了店里。爸爸站在柜台后面,眼镜架在鼻子上,在做晚报上的填字游戏。店里没有人。

“Baba,” I said. “I need your help.”

“爸爸,”我说。”我需要你帮忙。”

He put down his pen. In five years I had never said those words to him. I don’t think I had said them in ten.

他放下了笔。这五年里,我从来没有对他说过这句话。我想十年里也没有。

“Amara Mensah,” I said. “A little girl, nine, who came here recently. Her father is in hospital with a broken back. Do you know anything about her? Anything at all?”

“Amara Mensah,”我说。”一个九岁的小女孩,不久前才来这里。她爸爸摔断了背,在医院里。你知道她的什么事吗?什么都行。”

He looked at me for a long moment. He didn’t ask why I wanted to know. I think he already knew where I had been every evening.

他看了我很久。他没有问我为什么想知道。我想他已经知道我每天晚上去了哪里。

“She lives with her aunt above the launderette,” he said. “She is a shepherd in the children’s play. The teacher, Clara Novak, buys the sweets for the children here, every Thursday. Last week she told me something.” He took his glasses off. “She wants the children to go to the hospital on Christmas Eve, after the play, and sing for the patients. In their costumes. She is asking the hospital and the priest.”

“她和姑姑住在洗衣店楼上,”他说。”她在孩子们的戏里演牧羊人。那个老师,Clara Novak,每个星期四都在我们这儿给孩子们买糖。上星期她告诉了我一件事。”他摘下眼镜。”她想让孩子们在圣诞夜演完戏以后去医院,给病人唱歌。穿着他们的演出服。她正在问医院和神父。”

I kissed him on the cheek, across the counter. Then I didn’t run back to Edith. I ran to the school first, where the lights were still on, and found Clara Novak alone in her classroom, cutting out paper stars.

我隔着柜台亲了亲他的脸。然后我没有跑回 Edith 那里。我先跑去了学校。那里的灯还亮着,我看到 Clara Novak 一个人在教室里剪纸星星。

She was not pleased to see a journalist. She told me that the nativity play was already a nightmare, that the hospital hadn’t said yes, that Father Tom hadn’t asked the bishop, and that forty children in costumes in the snow was a nightmare. I told her that someone on the square would very much like it to happen. I didn’t say who. I said I would phone the hospital myself in the morning and stand with the children in the snow if she needed another adult. She looked at me for a long time, and then she said she would try.

她看到一个记者,不太高兴。她告诉我,圣诞剧已经够麻烦了,医院还没有说可以,Father Tom 还没有去问主教,而四十个孩子穿着演出服在雪里,真是太麻烦了。我对她说,广场上有一个人非常希望这件事能成。我没有说是谁。我说,明天早上我自己给医院打电话。如果她还需要一个大人,我也可以和孩子们一起站在雪里。她看了我很久,然后说她会试一试。

Then I ran back to Edith.

然后我跑回了 Edith 那里。

Edith listened. Then she closed her eyes and was quiet for a long time, and Ben waited with the pen above the paper.

Edith 听完了。然后她闭上眼睛,安静了很久,Ben 拿着笔,在纸上等着。

“Dear Amara,” she said at last. “Thank you for your letter. It was a brave letter to write. I cannot bring your father home for Christmas. His back needs time, and the doctors who look after him are wise. But listen to me carefully. If your father cannot come to Christmas, then on Christmas Eve, Christmas will come to him. Watch, and you will see. With love, N.”

“亲爱的 Amara,”她终于说。”谢谢你的信。写这封信需要很大的勇气。我不能让你爸爸在圣诞节回家。他的背需要时间,照顾他的医生们也很有经验。可是请你认真听我说。如果你爸爸不能来过圣诞节,那么在圣诞夜,圣诞节会去找他。你看着吧,你会看到的。爱你的 N。”